R L Ultimate Index

Photographic Installation
2017

I'm looking for the worst of myself

I’ve had an platonic love and never overcame the trauma

I like danger

I’m spying a neighbour’s window

I’ve always made melodrama

I’ve been bullied as a kid and considered killing myself for the first time when I was 9

I hate to look at myself in the mirror

Certainly I’m not gonna make it

Sometimes I feel alone but I cannot like anyone

A part of me wants to fight
The other wants to give up

Someone I loved died in my arms and I’ve never been the same since then.

In 1995 I had my first kiss and it was a fiasco.

I have a great sense of humour

I don’t accept the past and don’t believe in future either

My grandma was the most important person in my entire life.
A couple weeks before she died, she asked me to fill her coffin with roses.
But at the funeral I forgot it.

In high school I used to skip classes to smoke menthol cigarettes and have sex with strangers in the mall’s parking lot

I like to fake my name and my age

The biggest newspaper in town published a cover article about my work in the same morning that my energy was shut off due to lack of payment.

I’m terrible at making decisions

At the same time I’m shy and I love to show off

I am not against straight people. I even have friends who are.

I believe in Gods, UFOs and other mysterious forces.
I don’t believe in meritocracy.

I’m bipolar most of the time but sometimes I’m not